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Enter Fire and Brimstone Here


Okay, the previous weekend was something else. It started out as a really small fault on my part (sloth, one of the deadly sins, is my best friend), but escalated into something really, really massive that lasted from late Friday evening and was just resolved a couple of hours ago.

Orright. So let's own up first. I'm very, very lax when it comes to paying my bills, especially my electricity bills since the damn things usually don't go beyond PhP350.00, so to make it seem like I was actually using the electricity, I usually wait for two months before paying the entire shabang. Yes, it's a bad habit, I know, one that I need to fix, but that's not the point of this now is it. Anyway. The other day, the guys from CEPALCO arrived to cut off the line - something I was expecting, anyway, so I didn't bother none about it too much. I just finished dressing up, packed up my laptop, and headed to Cafe Ganaderos for a nice cup of coffee and free wi-fi. I passed by the CEPALCO office on the way, and paid my dues. I was pleasantly surprised when the attendant on duty told me that the company would probably have the power back on by six that evening; I was expecting at least a day's worth of waiting. So it was a relatively good day, so far.

I worked at Ganaderos to something around five thirty-ish, and made myself scarce, since I had to be on site when the power was reconnected (I think I had to sign some documents that stated that the grunts were doing their jobs). I got home in twenty minutes, and proceeded to wait in the dark for the people who would re-install the metre (which, I noticed, was missing from the wall when I got back).

Two hours later, and there wasn't even a twitter on my door. So I thought that maybe okay, services here weren't any different from the ones in Manila. I could wait a day. So I pack up for the night, head out to town for a beer or two, and get back to the house to sleep (Of course, I don't think I really got to sleep any that night; adrenalin from walking home kept me up the entire time).

At around eleven AM the next day, the people from CEPALCO still hadn't shown up, so to give them a not-so-friendly nudge towards my direction, I made my way to the nearest branch. The same woman I'd spoken to the previous day was pretty shocked when she found out that the power hadn't been restored, and promised me that the servicemen would be around by three later this afternoon; I had to work, so I asked if they could make it by six pm instead, but found out to my dismay that service during Saturdays ended at four.

Well, c'est la vie, I thought. I worked on what I could work on at Cafe Ganaderos, then at two thirty, hightailed it home so that I could be on hand to brat at the servicemen when they arrived.
Again, two hours later, at exactly four-oh-ten, there wasn't even the slightest tap on the door. CEPALCO had failed me once again.

To work off the irritation, I worked out for the rest of the afternoon, took a bath, and headed to Gabby's house for the evening drinking session. We ended up finishing a bottle of Ginebra Premium Gin and a smaller bottle of GSM Blue whilst watching Cowboy Bebop and Rockstar, and we adjourned at three in the morning. I spent the night at his place, and woke up feeling rather good - or, as John and Soren called it later on when we met up at Green Haven, "very Peter Parker-ish."

Sunday was a segue of sorts. I was only mildly pissed off by the fact that I still didn't have power, and that I missed around half a day's worth of work previously. I made my way to my house, took a bath, dressed up, and headed for the lunch rendezvous at Green Haven in Limketkai (Mongolian grill eat-all-you-can for PhP180 suckaz), and after three heaped bowls of all the food I could stomach, we headed out to mall for a bit. I swear, I was to pretty girls what a lightning rod was to lightning on a stormy night that day. It only helped to bolster my mood.

Later on in the evening, some of the BOTW people cornered me at the office and proceeded to drag me to a surprise despedida party (with all the bottles of alcohol present, I needed very little convincing). I ended up with a bottle of Ben More 5 years blended Scottish whiskey, and a card with this on the back:


which really, really made my day. :) Anthony Tisara, remind me to beat you up the next time I see you haha!

The battle for electricity at #4 Hughes Apartment raged on come Monday, however. It was twelve in the afternoon, I still didn't have electricity, and I was hungrier than a Kodiak bear during the peak of the summer heat. I snarled my way to the CEPALCO office, only to be told on my face that there was a problem with my meter - it was too fast (so I was paying more than what I should have been paying??) when the guy disconnected my line, which led to the re-installation delays.

I wanted to rain fire and brimstone at the woman then and there, destroy whatever remained of her ego into miniscule itty-bitty little pieces and leave them out as carrion for the crows to eat. I wanted to know why the hell I wasn't informed by the doofus who took away my metre when I was there sulking the entire time he was hacking away at the bloody wires? Why wasn't the incident included in the payment report? Why, after all this time, do I only find out NOW that I had to go to the main office, wait in line for four hours, and argue with some feel-good customer representative as to when the line could be fixed and power restored (which was what I did after trading dead air with the bimbo at the other office).

At the end of Monday, even with the promise of power restoration the next day, I felt like getting myself a lawyer and suing the pants off each and every CEPALCO executive. I mean, I would have understood if that guy'd only been so kind as to tap on my door, tell me "Sir, naguba ra ang imong meter," one of the few sentences in Bisaya that I could understand without playing pretend. Or if I were told beforehand. I wouldn't have missed two and a half days of work. I wouldn't be going on full throttle right now, two days before I left the city, just to make up for the tasks I missed. I'd be finishing up my packing, or finding somebody to buy the closet or the desk. I'd have bought myself a bloody balikbayan box for the things that wouldn't fit in my maleta.

But NO! NIET! Nein! I just had to deal with idiots during the entire time I spent at every goddamned CEPALCO office. My power had to be disconnected by the dumbest, most unprofessional serviceman in history.

I think this is one of the reasons God made sure I never went past high yellow in either tae kwon do or karate.

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